I cut my hair!

November 1st 2017, the day after halloween I cut my hair.

This might not seem that significant, however I cut 21 inches off my hair. I went from being a long haired beauty, to a short pretty pixie.

I had wanted to cut my hair off for a while and donate it. I just didn’t feel like I had the confidence to have short hair.

The reason this came about will be in a video because speech will be a better way of communicating it.

A lot of feelings came with me having short hair. I felt vulnerable because I didn’t have any hair to hide behind, I felt very insecure because I didn’t feel like I fit in the “societal beauty standards” for women.

Over the months, it got better and I felt a lot more confident. But I remember I was at hockey training and there were these groups of lads aged 9-12 there, being delinquents, and I kept wearing a beanie because  was insecure (this was a week after I cut my hair) and I remember them watching us girls train and I heard one of them say “guess which the boy is out of them” and I could tell that they were speaking about me, cause I was the only one with short hair.

It made me feel shit, but I didn’t let that comment define me. I donated my hair to charity, a child who is going through alopecia and chemotherapy would have had my hair for a wig. That help me through the insecurities and I felt a lot more secure.

I shook my head and went back to training and did what I do.

This post is short, but I am telling you to step outside your comfort zone and do something you would never normally do!

Katy Nells xoxo

Why I don’t like Christmas.

Now that the holiday season is over, I can finally voice my opinion without being that targeted.

I don’t like Christmas. It is a weird time for me. People associate Christmas with family and cheer, and Christmas Day is spent having fun, spending time together, you know being a family.

I don’t associate that with Christmas. If I spend Christmas with family, I find it awkward and weird. It is not something I want to do, to me it is just a normal day except we have a bigger dinner and there is a tree in the corner of the living room.

The memories I have of Christmas aren’t that great. And it pains me to write this because my mum would hate to read this, she loves Christmas, and tries to make every Christmas normal, but our Christmases aren’t normal. To me they are normal and everyone else’s way of doing Christmas is weird, but when I speak of my Christmas experiences, people find it weird.

When my mum and dad were together, when I was younger, around 5-6, it would be fine. But my dad was in the Royal Navy, and he would often have to go on duty, and sometimes this was on Christmas, so I wouldn’t spend Christmas with him. This became a normal thing for me, to have spouts in my childhood where my dad wasn’t there as he would be on duty, either in Scotland, or in middle eastern countries.

My mum and dad eventually got a divorce,  when I was in year six so I must have been 9 years old, and thats when Christmas started to become a weird thing for me. I would spend Christmas Day with my mum, then the rest of the afternoon with my dad and then I would go to my aunties on boxing day.

This then suddenly changed when my mum started to study to become a nurse. She would be on rota on Christmas and New Years, so there has been sometimes where I haven’t spent Christmas with either my dad or my mum, and then there are other times where we have to have Christmas dinner on another day, and we would have to reschedule Christmas to fit my parents schedule, so there has been a few times where our Christmas Day was on the 23rd, 24th, maybe even the 22nd.

I just don’t see the big deal with this time of the year, because my Christmas could be cancelled at any minute, and I believe that we should spend time with our families anyway, not because of the time of the season.

I do understand why people love it though. I often wonder, would I like it if my mum and dad where there at Christmas, or would I still dislike it?


Katy Nells xoxo

Work got me like

So I have a part time job. I have had it since half way through my second year of college, and when I am home from uni they want me to work. So I earn money, go back to uni and spend it on the essentials; you know that Russian Standard Vodka? Anyway, this weekend they had me work Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Safe to say that my feet hate me, but they can’t run away, since, you know they are attached to my body? No, not funny? I will just move on.

I work for a local catering company as a waitress. People hire them to cater for the event and I serve them the food. I like working for the company because I am not being a waitress in one place all the time like Pizza Hut, TGIF’S, Nandos etc I actually get to do a lot of different events, I have worked at a wedding, a few prom’s, charity events, church lunches, school reunions and a steam train. The company have a contract with a rail line that offer dinners, murder mystery evenings which require food which is where we come in.

Anyway, the event I worked at today (Sunday 4-7-16) gave me the inspiration to write this post. I get to work in so many different environments, I interact with a lot of different people and I meet new people that have joined the waitressing team. Which means I have gained a lot of skills and traits which I wouldn’t have learnt if I didn’t put my CV in.

Today I served a 40th wedding anniversary. It was stunning. There were red and white ribbons, rose petals, diamonds, fairy lights. It was truly beautiful and the building inside especially the staircase, I was amazed at the beauty that my eyes saw. I immediately said to myself that I need to get a picture of the staircase as my mum is obsessed with them, and I did right at the end of the event.

It just got me thinking that I am lucky that I get to do all these things, I get to experience events that I wouldn’t go to, I have learnt skills that I never knew existed, like “Silver Serving” which is the art of transferring food (different types of veg, meat, potatoes and bread) from one place (oven tray, basket or turine) to another (preferably the dinner plate) by using a spoon and a fork in your dominant hand.

Yes, it sounds difficult but once you master the skill you are a little bit more unique than those around you, unless you work with people who have to do it for their job then you are on par, but it’s a skill you can blab about.

Working has taught me many things like team work, organisation, punctuality, responsibility, it has taught me that working for money feels and is a lot better than asking your parents for it and getting to know that you can buy things with your own money is amazing. It has also taught me how to manage my money better, and I am no saint, I have spent and can happily spend £200 in a week on shoes and clothes. But, working has helped me put a reign on my spending habbits as I only earn a certain amount so ican only spend a certain amount.

My point is that work may seem like a pain, and it is a huge one in your ass, but what you learn from the job whether it be good or bad, it teaches you in a way that you don’t think is possible. You may learn that you hate jobs like that so you know in the future not to apply for a job like that again, you learn things that may transfer to your next job and of course the major plus is the money that you put in your pocket.

So life advice: Get a job. You will so much better about money and the fact that you are getting out of the house. Working makes my life a little less boring.

Katy Nella xoxo