Chapter 1; I went vegetarian for a week…

I have recently wanted to have become vegetarian/vegan.

I care about the environment and animals, but I cant be an advocate for the environment and animals, if I eat them and use them for products daily.

I tried to go vegetarian for a week. I completed it. And I am proud that I completed it. It wasn’t that difficult, but in a way it was. I had to really think about the snacks I wanted and I couldn’t go for my normal everyday food as that was meat.

I substituted my everyday Tuesday brunch, from a sausage butty for a jacket potato and beans. I tried a new sandwich which was just hummus and sweetcorn, this was disgusting, so I just didn’t end up eating it.

This week taught me how easy it was to become vegetarian, and how much will power I actually had.

This was a surprise because I didn’t actually think that much willpower.

I am writing this to tell people that if you want to do something, or change your life it is easy to do so.

I believe in the future that I will become vegetarian/vegan. I will document this change blog style and vlog style.

This will be a very difficult transition, because I am a meat eater. I love how easy meat is to cook, buy and store. But I want to do this, I love animals and I respect the earth, so I am going to change my behaviour for the world and my future kids.

As well as this, I will try and limit my carbon foot print. I have seen lots of people trying to live a zero waste lifestyle and I will try this soon, it will be difficult as the city I live in doesn’t have shops that are zero waste so I will have to do some research.

One of my best friends has just recently done a dissertation on how plastic is killing the earth and she is now living a zero waste lifestyle, so I will message her and get some tips from her, so she can help me and maybe help some of you guys.

This is the beginning of a new chapter for me and maybe I will inspire you to live the life you want to live to.

All I know is that I want to change myself and my life for the better.

Yours truly,

Katy Nells xoxo

We need to have mastur-debate :)

*Mature themes, readers discretion advised*

Masturbation.

Yes, I am going to write about masturbation. It is the act of pleasuring oneself. What was once a very taboo topic in society, masturbation has become less taboo as more people are doing it and talking about it.

It has a lot of benefits and I want to give you reasons why you should masturbate, at least once in your life. I believe that it is very sensual and it is amazing to find out what your body likes. It is a great way to get to know yourself, to get really intimate, and the more intimate you are with yourself, the more intimate you can be with someone else.

If you know what you like, what your body responds well to, then you can teach someone else how to make you feel great. It is great giving yourself the sexual freedom, to give yourself an orgasm, but I imagine it is even better to have someone else give you one. Many women fake their orgasms with men, because they don’t know your self like you do, so the more you know and the more you tell them will in turn give you a greater orgasm. And this works with men also, they know what speed, grip pressure and movement they would like you to do.

Everyone has their own way of getting off and when we share these sexual preferences we have, this will make the sex even more pleasurable for both parties. For me, masturbation gives me a few seconds of euphoria, and I feel great, relaxed and amazing.

When you are in touch with yourself sexually, you do a lot more, you can try different things, and you can share different sexual experiences with someone, coming closer to them. You can then share your fantasies, fetishes and it’s just a great way to get to know yourself and to bring someone in to your life.

Sex, sexuality and lust are regarded as both positive and negative in this days society. A woman who is very sensual, who is open with her sexuality is often called a slut, this stops women being open about their desires, how they feel, what they want, it stops them from expressing themselves, sexually. Any woman who is open about her experiences, who knows her stuff, who knows exactly what she wants, is regarded as a ‘freak’, but she is just in tune with her femininity and sexuality.

In my opinion, we shouldn’t be shutting out this conversation, we should be talking about it, we should be creating safe places for women who want to be sexual, without having the fear that stems from that. However, saying this we shouldn’t be labelling men either who have sex daily as players, they just want sex they enjoy it so they do it. Every person is different, and we should be open to everyones personalities.

But back to masturbation, there’s no reason not to do it. The benefits are; it helps you relax, it releases sexual tension, orgasms release endorphins which are hormone that block pain, it can help you sleep, improve your self esteem and body image, for women it can also reduce period pains and cramps (planned parenthood.org).

So with these benefits, there is really no argument against it. It is a natural instinct to have sex and reproduce, that doesn’t mean we can’t have little pleasure when doing it.

If you want anymore information then click this link.

I hope that 2018 brings you many orgasms.

Love

Katy Nells xoxo

Having No Motivation

So for the past few months I have had no motivation what so ever to do anything. I have a lot of stuff I need to do but re watching videos on YouTube and re watching my favourite series on Netflix just seems much more appealing to me. It has even taken me ten days to write this post.

Maybe it is because I am lazy, or maybe it is because I am easily distracted. Maybe I am just bored. I am a person who loves change, in someways. I quit things quite a lot because I bored. I have quite ballet, violin, swimming, I kinda quit college by not going in to the lessons. I don’t really finish something I intend or want to do, or I do it so half-heartedly that there is no effort and it is pointless. I like changing my hair colour, because I get bored of it, I want cover my skin in tattoos because my skin, to me, looks plain and boring.

I get tired of things so easily.

So when I have committed to something and gone through with something, like completing a project, reading a book, or even watching a film I dislike , I feel so accomplished.

I have three exams coming up, and two of these exams are on law and economics. I did law and business in college, and some of the topics I studied are on these exams. I feel like I am afraid to fail my first year because I failed my college exams. The pressure is getting to me a lot. I am scared that if I don’t pass then I can’t continue on to my second year, and uni is the one thing that I want to say that I have done, with a lot of effort. But now I just really can’t be arsed doing the work and I can’t complain of failing if I don’t put the effort in, so what do you do when this happens?

Before christmas I went on a night out and I drunk a lot of vodka and got really pissed. And someone made a comment, that shouldn’t have hurt me, but because I was drunk, it really got me, mentally. I was crying as it brought up a lot feelings, and memories from my past, and it brought back loads and loads of shit thoughts that I have had in the past, such as self harm, depressing thoughts and even suicide.

I have had trouble with all these things in the past, for a completely different reason, which I might write a post about or do a video, but when you have had these feelings of worthlessness, and failure, and something as miniature as a grade mark, or a stranger making a comment about being in the way on a public street, can set everything off again.

It is always a cycle.

For me I want to succeed, but there is a constant thought in the back of my head telling me that I can’t do whatever I a trying to do, or that my project will be bad and I will fail, or that I am too fat for anyone to think I am pretty or slim, or that I can’t wear that top I will look fat. Even if I feel great, no matter how happy I feel there is always a bad thought.

I try to do something (revise, tidy my room, go to the gym, eat healthy), then I don’t do it, or I see myself in the mirror and I think why am I doing this, I have tried in the past, it hasn’t worked. And then I feel even more shit because I haven’t done what I have wanted to do, and then thoughts happen again, you’re lazy, you procrastinate to much and it never ends.

I try to think on the positives but when your mind is tipping on the side of negative because you have so many negative thoughts,it just doesn’t help.

I need to change. This weekend I practically spent all of it asleep because my sleeping pattern is messed up, I could have tidied my room and done my work, but I didn’t have the drive to do anything.

What should you do when you feel like this?

I am going to try a bunch of things to tackle this, and then I will try to write them on here. Maybe I shouldn’t say try. I should say do. Replacing ‘try’ words with doing words might help. I don’t know. But I am trying to learn and I am trying to be a better me.

We are put on this earth to be ourselves, and it’s okay to better yourself. This earth needs the best you and you deserve the best self you can. I honestly don’t know if this is making any sense, I got six hours sleep and I have a 9am in an hour so, sorry for the long ass post, I just wanted to get everything of my chest. And if anyone is feeling like this or has felt like this you can get in touch, I will make time to talk,as talking to someone is sometimes one of the best ways to medicate yourself.

Love

KatyNella xoxo