A letter to my dad

I have wrote a letter to my mum, now I am going to write one for my dad.

When I was in year 8 I had appendicitis, I was in the hospital for 2 weeks with borderline septicemia, my mum was there every day and I am grateful. My dad took two weeks off work to stay with me, and during that time we watched Dodgeball over and over, we played minesweeper, spider solitaire, we just spent days playing games. He told me before the operation, (as they thought I had an interception of the bowl therefore they would have had to remove half my intestine and I would have needed a colostomy bag, before this I was very scared of what was going to happen, especially being 12 years old,) he told me to “Be Brave, Stay Strong”. This message has stayed with me since then.

You gave me my taste in music. Now I listen to 90’s trance, r and b, hip hop to the Fratellies. My fondest memories are in the car with you driving us somewhere listening to DMX then the Blackout Crew. You have given me a variety of music and I thank you for that.

You made me take karate, judo, and jujitsu. I didn’t want to but I am grateful that you did because now I can protect myself in this very scary world.

I want to apologise for when you bought me a jacket from Antarctica and I hardly wore it because I was young and stupid and cared about what people thought. I should have found it cool because you went to FUCKING ANTARCTICA.

We would play Star Wars Battlefront when you came home from duty, thank you for lighting a flame in me that enjoys games and Star Wars. But you also lighted the flame of competition and competitiveness. I would kill you and you would kill me, what I am thankful for is that you would kill me and not let me always kill you, just like air hockey, sometimes you wouldn’t go easy and it makes me happy cause I learnt life lessons from this. That it’s not always gonna go your way.

You make the most basic scrambled eggs, but they are the best and no-ones will come close.

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You treated and still treat me like a princess, but also to be a badass bitch. You always wanted boys, so I think that’s why I grew up as a tomboy, but now I am thinking that I was just a badass princess. I remember we went to laser quest and it was just me you and some random boys, I was the only girl. It was sci-fi week and we had to choose names from sci-fi. I chose the baddest bitch of them all – Buffy. I won, I came on top all because we would play laser quest daily.

You didn’t force ‘female’ or ‘male’ stereotypes so I grew up as a confident woman who enjoys a lot of things that don’t conform to either male or female.

One thing you have given me, which I will cherish for my life and pass down to my children, is a love of history. You love history and you have instilled that love on to me. Especially military history, you always take us to the imperial war museum, and nothing changes, but I love going because I spend time with you, and we share an interest. This love has influenced my life, I want to do a master’s degree in archeology and anthropology.

You’re in the Navy, and I know there is a touchy subject with the Armed Forces, but I will always be proud and will always brag about this to people, you have done so many things, and helped so many people, risking your life to do it. This inspires me to do the same, even to the point of when I wanted to join the Armed Forces and even become a policewoman, to protect and help those who can’t themselves.

You have so many stories, and I  can’t wait to learn more, I can’t wait to pass them down for generations.

You also gave me my Manchester heritage and last name, which I am going to pass on to my children, even if I have to double-barrel.

You always would bring bags and bags of cyalumes home, and then you would make metre long lightsabers for me, Amy and Lucy to fight with, you definitely brought the nerd out in me.

Thank you for helping me with my history projects in high school, aka doing them for me.

You weren’t home a lot because of your job, but it taught me that you don’t need to spend every day with someone to have a bond, if anything our bond is stronger because of the time we had together was so much more precious, because when you went to Iraq and Bahrain, it could have ended.

I think the fact that there was always a chance of when you got drafted, even though your job was bomb disposal, (you were based in Scotland and did stuff in the coastline of Britain, and that is still dangerous), when you got sent to other countries, there was always a realisation and acceptance that you might have been one of the ones to make the number increase. It was scary watching the news and seeing that 400 soldiers were killed and they will never come back to their families and you could have been one of them. Thankfully, you weren’t.

We would send letters to each other, I still have these and read them, because they are special.

You and mum have shaped me into the forthright, independent, confident, badass woman I am today, for you I am happy and thankful and what you have taught me I will pass on to my children.

Everyone says I act like you, and by that they mean your temper, but I think they also mean your tenacity.

I am proud to be a Morgan and I am proud to be your daughter.

Not to mention I got my good looks from you.

I love you.

 

 

 

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